It happens so suddenly
You are 36 when all of a sudden
You are transported into
“Is this all there is?”

All of a sudden
The years roll by
Children are now young adults
Husbands that were then - quite sufficient
Have now taken a downward turn

Social security seems so effortless
Problems imagined
Are now taken care of by the state
Until you realize that the state
Is bankrupt

So here you are in bed
With the lover of your dreams
Realizing that your dreams are spent and that he
Is most probably - the only one who will put up with you
Giving him a climax
As if he were in his 30s

It really doesn’t matter
This type of romance is far beyond you
You care for none of it, knowing a far deeper meaning
But you are thankful that he cares
For it gives you substance
A reason to believe
On the very weekend
That your oldest granddaughter
Is to be married.

Is this not the cycle of continuance?


Here I am in my golden years
Having only loved what was proper
A husband, lovers – ever so concerned
As to my status in life and my children’s legacy

And now that I am old
I meet the man who satisfies all of my wonderings
Someone to whom I can give my soul
Much too late for it to matter

Decades of doing what is right
Melt into your embrace
For what should I care now?
As to anyone’s tongue or opinion

I belong to you as I did for ages
Before you entered into my life
I dreamed of you in secret
Not even knowing the sacraments you beheld

And here I have you yet but a few scarce weeks
To hold you, to love you, to bind myself to your heart
Oh, could I have the opportunity just to begin again
I would take you to my land of always perfect dreams


Dual windows forever approach me
opposite landscapes, never to let me be
options, yet more choices, unable to decide
both equally beaconing, currently abide
Dual Windows

The first is vast and fragrant, yet filled with much desire
Elegance and music that light my heart a-fire
aglow with abundance, my will is much fulfilled
opulence sated, my heart yet aches - unstilled

a rustic cabin lurks, deep within my mind
of days gone past, emotions - however yet unkind
windows shaded over, filled mostly with my needs
pulling, yanking at me, down amongst the reeds

laces, frills and fabrics, forever fill my senses
stories of romance, waltz throughout my menses
tales of yesteryear, whisper longingly in my ear
passions of days long ago, I eagerly yearn to hear

nights of shadows, lurking ghosts
come to me in dream's repost
times of loss, poverty yet wonder
singing vastly different tales sexual plunder

coaches, horses, petticoats of lace
rouges, perfumes, powders laid upon my face
castles, turrets, flowered meadows lined up in a row
servants and tradesman continually come and go

silent Spanish mosses, drip from boughs of trees
peasants working in the fields, plowing on their knees
moonlight in wonder, streams through dirty panes
in dreams we happily skip down dusty country lanes

minuets and harpsichords playing to our ears
reality appearing, tho dimmed, through lacy window sheers
housemaids a'calling, approaching dinner's set
glorious sunsets yet heart's desire unmet

Glorious woodlands, ablaze with misty glow
lost in forgetting, we find ourselves in woe
neglecting God's full nature, search of tomorrows bright
discover ourselves enclosed, dark stillness of the night

Continually seeking brightness - the meaning of it all
never thinking of the madness, right before the fall
dual windows - none relating to our heart
thus we die lonely and separate, totally apart.

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