Letter to Mike and Greg - May 2, 2013
To you, my sons -

Motherhood is a strange thing - obviously something that neither of you will ever be able to understand personally, because you will never be a mother, but something you can certainly understand through me - your mother and through the fact that you are both fathers.

I realize that I have made a lot of mistakes in my life - but I want for each of you to know that nothing, and I mean absolutely nothing, has meant more to me than the birth of you, my sons, and to the beautiful and talented grandchildren that you have given me. I also want for you to know that even though you think I deserted you to go to the Caribbean after you both had graduated from high school - nothing was further from my mind. You needed to fly - to take off in your own lives. And I knew it would be better for you each of you if you did it alone - regardless of the lessons and heartbreak that followed, for that is the way life is. My job was over - to prepare you for it - not to stick around forever.

But now I realize that this move, to be back in your lives with David, is unusual. You now both have wives and a life that I have never known. And yes, it has taken me four years to recognize this fact. But then - such is life. And I truly thank you for accepting David, as a man I most truly and dearly love, into your lives as a helpmate and advisor. He truly loves you both and would do anything to make me, and you, happy. I am totally blessed ~~~

I gave each of you the best 18 years of my life. With the help of your father, I took you to Europe, to the Caribbean, to Mexico and to Australia, New Zealand, Fiji, Hawaii and other various trips - advantages that 99 % of the children of the world could ever have even imagined, much less known. I personally took you, Michael, throughout Florida to look for several different colleges and you, Greg, to the Univ. of California. I raised you both in an intellectual atmosphere of art, literature and religious freedom so that you could choose your individual path as you grew older. Through me you obtained your love of the sea, and nature - poetry and music - and I hope the respect for all of humanity and the compassion that is necessary for love and empathy for others on our planet, regardless of individual differences.

Your father and I chose to stay in Ocean Springs so that you would know the peace and friendship that exists in a small, rural community in growing up and I hope you both appreciate that fact. We considered it in both of your self interests that you could ride your bike to school and have boats, bicycles, cars etc. to use at your disposal and with the freedom to explore all that life has to offer. I personally, would have loved to stay in New York where I could have advanced my career beyond being Miss Nancy in Romper Room, close to my brother, but I knew that would not have been in your best interests.

We bought the Lovers Lane home so that both of you could have your own individual spaces while sharing a common TV room. We never told you, but this was a plan of ours - just as it was my plan to conceive each of you to be born when you were. And how glad I am that I planned each of your births as to almost the day. And because you were planned, and loved, and given the best that we could afford, in both a spiritual, intellectual, physical and a monetary level, we felt that we had been successful parents. So I can really look back on my stewardship as your mother and feel that I have done my best. And I know this applied to your father also. After all, who loved you enough to set you up in business?

And now it is time for me to ask for something in return. I am having a total knee replacement on Wednesday and I must admit that I am scared shitless. I have put this off for far to long but that does not diminish my fear - no matter how brave I appear in public. Although I hate to admit it, I am having a lot of pain and it will be far worse in the months to come. I really and truly hurt.

What I ask is this - that you remember me in your prayers, thoughts and meditations. Love is expressed differently in each of us so please help me in whatever way possible - mentally and spiritually. I don't want flowers or gifts or even visits, although that would be nice, but if I could just open my email every morning and see a happy and cheerful message from each of you, for about a week, I would be most grateful.

I don't think that I have ever asked you for anything in my life - but I am asking you for this.

I totally need your love and support.

Mahalo - Mom/Mama

July 27, 2013 -
Today was an absolutely perfect day as I got to spend the entire day with Christian and Lauren. I picked Christen up at the house at 9 and we took Greg's truck to go to Garage Sales. I had done my homework last night and had them all typed out in order. Greg's truck has a GPS in it so Christian entered the addresses and we were off.
He is such a dear young man- so polite, so loving and soooo smart. We went several places and ended up buying a bureau with four large drawers, 2 lamps, a desk chair and a 46" Flat TV that he just loves and I hope will work for him.
Greg & Mamie have given him their garage apartment which works so well. Cute thing that he is, he painted the walls gray and they look just great. I am framing several of my art tissue papers for him and also gave him our blowup bed - so he will finally have a place of his own. He is such a joy to buy for.

I then took both Christian and Lauren to Zippys for lunch and they picked out tissue paper collages Christian would like for his room - good choices, if I say so myself.

Later, While Christian was home putting everything together, I took Lauren to Forever 21 to buy shorts. She is so sweet and adorable and looks fantastic in absolutely everything she tries on. I love these two so much so it is a pleasure to buy for them. I told her that I would buy her three pairs but she only found two that she really liked so she gladly settled for those. I am so proud of her and find her so mature - Christian too.

So for me, as their grandmother - it was a perfect day. Such love very few women my age happen to experience. Lucky Lady

Hospital December 2013 Holy Fucking Cow - what a total disaster - being in the hospital for four days at a cost of 50K + and not knowing any more when you come out than when you arrived. I have a lot of this documented in my notebook but it is so much easier for me to write on the computer. This last week has been a total misfit into my life. How dare my heart act up in such a way. There is no end to the trouble that my Type A personality puts me into. Honestly - my god what a trip this last week has been.

So to get away from all of this complete trauma I have been on Zillow all night and have not only rented a gorgeous house http://www.zillow.com/homedetails/714-El-Dorado-Pkwy-W-Cape-Coral-FL-33914/45441686_zpid/ but completely furnished it through craigslist. What a wonderful way to spend five hours I totally furnished this home and had a ball doing it. I have so loved living on Swan Song and having all of the adventures that Dave and I have had during the past 12 years but as of now I am so ready to move off of it and have a home/house. What a ball it will be decorating a completely empty home - not taking one thing of my own but leaving all of it here in Hawaii to be given to the kids and grandchildren (if they want it). Dave and I can start from scratch. An empty home = a clean palate. A wonderful new start at 74 - what a ball to look forward to. Certainly better than dwelling on my health, death and blah, blah, blah - yadda, yada, yadda

Happy Birthday to my Dear Sara, (Shirley's granddaughter

I know that I am just your old Aunt Nancy and that I don't know you very well; yet I have followed everything you have ever done on the postings made by your mum on Facebook. I have a huge "Sara File" with pictures and journals that I have written concerning your life and your many accomplishments.

May I say at the onset that this is a very private letter - a letter from me to you and I entrust you to keep it that way. What I say in this birthday message to you might greatly offend members of your family and I would never intend that. Never - so be a woman of your word and now, that you are a woman, learn to keep secrets and to guard them. For a letter from me to you is a form of love, in the highest respect and is not to be taken lightly.

The reason that I am starting out in this manner is because I know that you are different from the rest of your family. You are an artist, with talent that can really be developed into a life sustaining force, should you so choose. You were born into an ultra conservative family and I greatly respect that, although I cannot imagine anything more unpleasant. Life is an adventure - it is a series of choices that will make you what you are and will provide for you, if you have the courage, a lifestyle of the highest magnitude.

My first piece of advise is to screw money and safety - boring, boring. boring and from which you learn absolutely nothing. Learn to take chances, learn to explore, learn to question and learn to listen. It goes without saying that drugs and promiscuity are not included in this = stay away from both. But learn to explore, learn to love being different, instead of feeling that you are odd. You are odd = you are very odd - you are an artist, you are a musician, your imagination is ripe and ready for what life has to offer. I have read of what you have accomplished in the humanities and I do so salute you. Don't you dare conform - conformity is for those who are scared, who have the fear of truly living. Be daring, be liberal but also be very, very careful.

You don't know much about me but I am a person who has lived by the advice I am giving you now. I rebelled against the stupidity of our country's puritanical ways when I was in my teens. It started 13 with my Presbyterian background - they could never answer any of my questions on predestination. They still can't. I am highly spiritual and always have been but I have a total disrespect for organized religion - especially now with the religious right - who no more live according to the dictates of Jesus and the Rothschilds. Learn who they are for they are the slugs of our planet - along with the Rockefellers, Mellons, and other elitist families of our nation. They are rotten to the core. Learn this, know this, for they are leading our country into self-destruction.

I was given the talents of questioning, believing and discovering. I have climbed most of the Mayan Temples and am very knowledgeable about their culture, I have explored the Amazon and know the culture of their mind inducing plants, I marched with Martin Luther King, I protested the Vietnam War with babies on my back when Bud was serving in the military, I was an occupier of Anonymous, I have cruised thousands of miles, all of the Western Hemisphere, have hiked the outback of Australia, bought wool from the sheep herders of Australia ( I am a weaver) and have snorkeled the South Pacific. I have visited Europe many times and have become enthralled with the beauties of their museums. I have traveled South America and visited Manchu Pichu and consider primitive art as my most favorite art-form. I collect pre-modern Afghanistan saddle rugs and have a marvelous collection. I could go on and on and on. But this missive is not to impress you - it is to encourage you to leave your mid=western cocoon and explore the world. Dare to be different. Dare to live the life you want to life - and from looking at your venture into the humanities it is far away from home.

Don't get me wrong. Your grandmother Shirley is the most dear person in my life. She is a rock. She is stable. She is wonderful. and yet I cannot live by any of her conservative thesis. I am a socialist when it comes to education and medicine. No student should bear a student loan (and with interest, can you believe that??) No one should have to pay for medical care. These two things, education and health services, should be free to ever single human being on the planet and especially the United States. Beyond that I am a capitalist but not at a profit exceeding 10%. I won't go into my politics here but you can certainly see that I would be a total outcast in Indiana.

Now, about the earrings. What a wonderful history they have and how very happy I am to be able to present them to you in honor of this great occasion of your 16th birthday,

It occurred to me tonight, sitting on our dock in Waikiki while staring at the beach and hotels that line our marina, that I am the most privileged woman in my ancestry, on both sides, to have been born within 1000 years. Now when I say privileged I mean educated, learned, cosmopolitan, well traveled, etc. My ancestors, the knights and favored of English aristocracy, obviously had more lands, more titles and more money than I - but none of their women fared as well. I am so very fortunate to have lived in this time and era (1940 - 2013); to have had the opportunity to be able to have the education that I have earned - a Bachelor of Arts in Education and a Master of Arts in Literature. No woman in my family has ever had that privilege or opportunity before me. And, sadly, none of my female descendants, thus far, shows any sign of excelling further than I have.

To think that my generation, more than any behind me or seemingly ahead, had progressed more than any others is mind boggling. I have to include my brother, Jim, in this. My god = what he accomplished on his short span of 45 years is unbelievable.

Tuesday, December 18, 2007
Obituaries
JAMES TERRELL, STORE ARCHITECT, 45
Published: August 22, 1989
James Terrell, an architect who developed designs for many of the nation's leading stores, including Saks Fifth Avenue, Macy's and Bloomingdale's in New York and Marshall Field in Chicago, died of AIDS at New York Hospital on Saturday. He was 45 years old and lived in Manhattan.
James Terrell, an architect who developed designs for many of the nation's leading stores, including Saks Fifth Avenue, Macy's and Bloomingdale's in New York and Marshall Field in Chicago, died of AIDS at New York Hospital on Saturday.
Mr. Terrell was a graduate of the Yale University Graduate School of Architecture and a member of the American Institute of Architects and the Institute of Store Planners.
He became known in the 1970's for innovative department-store designs, for which he won many awards. Explaining his new approach to retail stores, he once said, ''Each department should be a theater, with the feeling of individual shops tied together by architecture.''
One of his more famous designs, in 1979 for the main floor of Bloomingdale's, employed black marble, black plastic, black paint and a lot of brass to create what Paul Goldberger described in The New York Times as ''the most daring piece of large-scale store design in a decade.''
Mr. Terrell also designed the escalator well that is housed in a tower of its own at Saks Fifth Avenue. Mr. Terrell's designs won Store of the Year Awards four times.
In 1980, Mr. Terrell was a founding partner of Hambrecht Terrell International and served as its president. He was also chairman of the fund-raising committee of the Design Industry Foundation for AIDS.

Mr. Terrell is survived by his sister, Nancy Terrell Longnecker of St. John, V.I., and two nephews, Michael Emmett Longnecker and Gregory Stuart Longnecker; great-nephew Taylor Hilty Longnecker and great-niece Lauren Elizabeth Longnecker.

It is fairly difficult, in this day and age to beat this. Not nearly so grand, but still impressive is my resume in Wiki =

Nancy Terrell
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Nancy Clendenin Terrell was born in Richmond, Virginia, in 1940 to James Emmett Terrell, Executive Vice President of Mead Johnson Company and Nannie Belle Clendenin. On the Terrell side she traces her family back to President Thomas Jefferson (her 8th great uncle) whose sister, Martha, is Nancy's 8th great grandmother. Nancy is an internationally known journalist whose articles featuring cruising and life in the greater Caribbean are widely read. She is a graduate of DePauw University where she was a member of Kappa Kapppa Gamma and holds a Master of Arts Degree in Literature from the University of Southern Mississippi where she was an honors student. Her brother, James Terrell, was a noted architect, well known for his AIDS activism, according to his obituary in the New York Times.
Nancy was "Miss Nancy" on Romper Room in the 1960s and 1970s for the American Broadcasting Company (ABC). In 1973 she hosted the daily program Southern Outlook for General Electric Cablevision (GEC), one of the first cable companies in America. With her crew of five, she traveled the southern states and videotaped over 700 on location programs for General Electric. Two of her documentaries on "The Problems of Aging in America" won the first place award from The Associated Press in both 1974 and 1975. These studies were used as guidelines for problems addressing senior citizens by AARP in the 1970s. During these two years she was also named as an Outstanding Young Women of America.
In 1982 the City of Biloxi, Mississippi, featured Nancy's weavings when it opened the Biloxi Cultural Center now known as The George E. Ohr Arts and Cultural Center. The One Woman Show, consisted of 20 of her weavings, is featured in Fiber Art; they hang in homes and restaurants throughout North America. Nancy was also chosen by the Mississippi Arts Commission to represent the tri-state area as a Master Weaver at the 1984 Louisiana World Exposition.

Also In 1982 Nancy Terrell (Longnecker) edited a book published by the University Press of Mississippi entitled "Dusti Bonge - The Life of an Artist." Funding was provided by Standard Oil, Litton Industries Inc. and the City of Biloxi. The book was given to each high school art student, in the state of Mississippi, who was taking advanced/abstract art. Nancy and Ms. Bonge traveled throughout the state presenting a slide show of Bonge's art and explaining abstract art to art students. The Mississippi Commission on the Arts later filmed a documentary of the book Dusti Bonge - Life of an Artist interviewing Ms. Bonge before her death in 1993. Nancy then went on, in 1986, to edit Leif Anderson's book on abstract/interpretive dance, Dancing through Airth. Anderson is the youngest daughter of internationally known artist Walter Inglis Anderson and is the author of several other books on dance.
On the Terrell side of the family, Nancy can trace her lineage back to William the Conqueror and the Normans (Tirel) and then on to Charlesmagne (see Genealogy at www.missnancysjournal.com)

In 1986 Nancy moved to the British Virgin Islands where she began freelance writing for such magazines as Cruising World Magazine, Latitudes & Attitudes Magazine, Caribbean Boating, Nautical Scene,Caribbean Compass,Caribbean Landfalls, Crew Life and All At Sea. Nancy worked actively for both the West End Yacht Club and the Royal BVI Yacht Club located on the island of Tortola. She is currently a full time cruiser who covers the Caribbean for All At Sea magazine[1]

Nancy made her home on a 35 year old classic Roughwater TrawlerSwan Song, where she lived with her partner of 16 years, Captain Dave Cooper. Together they cruised most of the Western Hemisphere including the east coast of America, the Bahamas, The Caribbean, South America, Panama, Central America, Mexico and Hawaii. She and Dave moved to Hawaii, on Swan Song, in 2009 where she i was on the State Board of Kappa Kappa Gamma as well as the Honolulu Panhellenic Association. She recently published an art book, "The Art Work of Nancy Terrell - a Fifty Year Perspective - 2012" .

After an active five year residency in Hawaii, Nancy and Dave sold Swan Song, and moved to Cape Coral, Florida, where they bought a home. Nancy finally had the studio she had always wanted and spent most of her time exploring different art mediums. She became an active member of the Cape Coral Art League, The Fort Myers Art League, The Alliance of the Arts, the American Association of University Women (AAUW) and the Alumna Association of Kappa Kappa Gamma. She and Dave bought another trawler, Gratitude, and enjoyed short trips along the southwestern coast of Florida. She was a member of the Center for Spiritual Living in Cape Coral.

She is the mother of Michael and Gregory Longnecker, owners of X-treme Parasail in Honolulu and the grandmother of Lauren Elizabeth Longnecker Frazier (25) of Keesler AFB in Biloxi, Taylor Hilty Longnecker (24) of Boston, MA, Christian Terrell Longnecker (17), Hanna Marie Longnecker (16), Lauren Phillips (15), Luke Longnecker (8) and Liana Longnecker (5) all of Honolulu, HI.

April 19 = the day before Easter 2014

We have now been in our CC house for 10 days. When we left Honolulu Christian was in a tizzy as to how to tell Greg that he wanted to spend his senior year in Gulfport with his mother and soccer team mates. He was very worried about Greg's reaction - that he would be terribly angry. I told him that Greg would understand as he had transferred back to OS from Mercy Cross before his senior year and would understand how he felt. I could not have been more wrong. When Christian told Greg he went into a barrage of hateful comments and anger beyond belief. It was so bad that Christian had to leave the house, walk up the hill and call his mother. All he could think of was escape and I don't blame him.

Move forward 24 hours = I had called Greg and really come down on him as his mother. I don't recall having ever done that recently, although I have wanted to. I really let him have it as to his problem with anger and aggression. During this conversation he told me that Bud had been very angry and vengeful towards both of the boys, hitting Michael so hard that he passed out. I was outraged as I never remembered anything of this kind as a family. Greg's reply was that I was out. I have no idea as to whether this was a one time occurrence or what but I was not about to pursue the matter. He then continued in a state of anger that I have witnessed many times with him - against Christian, against his generation, against everyone who was not of his ilk.

This went on for ages. I tried to interupt. I told him that I had just had a heart attack and could not hear such things - he continued on - bam, bam, bam. It was then I realized that he has a mental illness of a sort. His rage at everything is so unpredictable, so outrageous, so off the wall that I realized exactly why we had left Hawaii. I do not like my sons. I love them, but I do not like them. They are both so distorted so very sick. Michael is an alcoholic that only Dee Dee and I recognize. He drinks all day long and this drinking is bound to get him into problems once it is discovered. He is also suicidal - alcohol is a depressant, after all. And there is just no dealing with Greg - he is completely off the wall. The man is insane as only a right wing conservative Christian can be.

What I find myself asking is - how in the world did this happen? What did I do wrong?

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